Hormones Behind Sexual Intimacy and How They Foster Your Sex Life?

What makes a relationship work? While the answers to this vary, most do agree that intimacy is an essential element. It is a core pillar of love as defined by the relationship researcher Robert J. Sternberg.

Intimacy is the emotional and physical closeness that exists between two people, related to feelings of trust, friendship and sexual chemistry. In the early stages of a relationship, our body hormones play a very important role in building intimacy - from first attraction to how we relate sexually.

Types of Intimacy

Intimacy can manifest and develop in different ways, and is related to more than just romantic relationships.

Psychologists define 3 main types on intimacy:

• Sexual intimacy: based on sexual attraction and the phenomenon of desire, when we want to have sexual intercourse with someone.

• Physical intimacy: involves physical closeness, physical connection, touch, and cuddles. Physical intimacy is the key element when infants bond with their mothers.

• Emotional intimacy: a sense of attachment and friendship based on trust, closeness, vulnerability and authenticity. We develop emotional intimacy not only with romantic partners, but also in other close relationships - such as friends or family members.

Different types of intimacy can exist at the same time and also affect each other - for example, while some relationships can be profound without sexual intimacy, a sexual relationship can feel shallow without emotional intimacy. Intimacy is also directly related to different chemicals that our brain produces in the process of relating to others. These chemicals have specific effects on the body, emotions, and behaviors.

The Hormones which Affect Feelings of Intimacy

When we look to build stable and healthy relationships, it’s important that we understand the hormonal impact of intimacy and how it works in our bodies.

1. Sexual desire – Testosterone and Estrogen

The hormones influencing our libido and sexual desider are testosterone and estrogen, but they are also crucial to our overall health. Apart from impacting sex drive, testosterone also regulates fat distribution, muscle mass and strength and produces red blood cells to create sperm as reported by National Institute of Health. Estrogen supports the cardiovascular system, bone health and cognitive health as per Medical news Today.

In the early stages of relationships and sexual attraction, these hormones are related to experiences of reduction in chronic pain, higher energy level and overall better health.

2. Attraction and Reward hormones - Dopamine and norepinephrine

When dopamine and norepinephrine are active, we experience a sense of reward which leads us to seek out repeat experiences. The attraction is especially potent when the relationship is fresh, novel, and exciting. Dopamine and norepinephrine make us feel energy, joy, excitement, and other pleasant experiences that we want to seek out again. These neurotransmitters activate our alertness by elevating blood pressure, regulate sleep-wake cycle, and increase attention and memory. Alongside better health performance in the first stage of relationship, we experience better mental performance. This lays the groundwork for building sexual and emotional intimacy.

3. Balancing hormone – Serotonin

Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that functions as the messenger between nerve cells. It plays an essential role in regulation of digestion, emotions, moods and memory. It also balances our cortisol levels and releases stress. Both Dopamine and Serotonin affect the same functions in the body, just in a different way. While Dopamine makes us seek the same pleasures repeatedly, Serotonin makes adequate evaluations of it and increases capacity to enjoy that pleasure.

Both of these hormones are produced in large amounts during sexual intercourse and increase the levels of intimacy.

4. Attachment - Oxytocin

The hormonal rush that we experience in the first stages of a relationship, motivates us to secure this experience by creating attachment which in turn strongly contributes to intimacy.

Attachment is the bond we forge with friends, family members, and also romantic partners and is the basis for any close relationships. The key neurochemical involved in attachment is oxytocin. It arises during physical touch, kissing, eye contact and positive communication. The early stages of relationships lead to natural rise in oxytocin due to regular physical and sexual intimacy.

Oxytocin is released in large quantities during orgasm, which explains why we tend to develop stronger attachment to partners we have better sex with. It also contributes to sperm transport and production of testosterone in men and ease of pregnancy and lactation for females as it positively affect the erectile tissue for men and women.

So, when we talk about a “feeling of chemistry” between people, it’s important to remember we are often talking about chemistry. Literally.